DEAR SURLY, I'm 16 and have grown up religious my whole life. I get good grades and stay out of trouble. A lot of my friends have done crazy things like drinking and partying, but I haven't. Because of this, I have the reputation of being a 'goody-two-shoes.'
I'm not saying it's a bad thing being a good girl, but I don't want to be a goody-two-shoes. Part of me wants to try some of the stuff my friends have been doing, but I don't want to lose my parents' trust. Please help! -- RESTLESS IN OREGON
RESTLESS, by Jove's Beard go out do some crazy! I'll add a caveat, but I implore you to recognize that you're only young once. Mark Twain said "Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."
The caveat, of course is be a bit responsible about the crazy. If you want to join in the high school orgies, employ protection so you don't have lifelong reminders of it. If you want do some drinking don't overdo it, and for hell's sake don't drive. Enjoy yourself now, but make sure you're not paying for it forever.
DEAR SURLY, My daughter left our small Midwestern town for the West Coast to marry money. At 37, she finally snagged her millionaire. She thought it was going to give her a blank check.
She does live in a lovely home and drives an expensive foreign car, but that's where it ends. Everything is in his name, and her wedding ring is one we gave her, although he paid to remove the stone and have it polished. I told her then to walk away.
They have two children. Her son is a spoiled brat, completely self-absorbed like his dad. Her daughter has learning disabilities and is still at home.
My daughter would never leave him. She loves the lifestyle too much. If she only knew how most of her extended family think of them. I'm embarrassed by it, really.
I just thought your readers should know that marrying money isn't necessarily the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. -- HER MOM IN WISCONSIN
MOM, she chose to forego love in exchange for a bankroll, but now she wants both. Lame. Your daughter has an advantage over those who marry the poor in that money can buy a fair facsimile of love--get a pool boy or a personal trainer ... wink, wink. Not an option for everyone, but your fortunate daughter can afford it.
See Abby's responses at http://www.uexpress.com/dearabby/?uc_full_date=20100327
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