DEAR SURLY, I have been dating a guy who is wonderful, caring -- everything a woman would want. There's just one problem. When he takes off his shirt, he has an extremely ugly mole. It looks suspicious and is irregularly shaped. I can't stand looking at it, but my eyes are drawn to it like to a car wreck. To top it off, it has hair growing out of it.
I know he probably pays no attention to it because it's on his back. But I see it staring back at me. How do you tell a loving and caring man that you're turned off by his scary mole? -- GROSSED OUT IN OKLAHOMA CITY
GROSSED OUT, you're a shallow, self-absored bitch. If he's a great guy but you have a hang-up on his surface, he's too good for you--with one caveat: suspicious looking? If the blemish is sinister, and he's not have it looked at by a doctor, he should. Not for your squeamishness. It's all about his health. Maybe you'll get lucky, and he'll need to have it removed.
DEAR SURLY, It's tax season, and once again, my husband and I are faced with our annual 'conflict.' We buy a tax program for our computer and do our own taxes. Every year, one of our daughters has my husband do her taxes. After he completes them, he returns the forms so she and her husband can sign them. The problem is, they never pay the taxes they owe.
My daughter and son-in-law owe thousands of dollars, and I know they risk being audited by the IRS. If that happens, I am sure the kids will say that my husband actually did the taxes, which could draw us into their problem. It might even target us to be audited. I don't want to be dragged into this potential problem. My husband thinks I'm being silly and borrowing trouble unnecessarily. What do you think? -- HONEST TAXPAYER IN WISCONSIN
HONEST, You have to think of the IRS like they're thugs because they are thugs. They don't care who filled in or filed papers. They only care that they get their money. If their money is withheld, do they make nice with the debtor and find the guy who filled in papers?
DEAR SURLY, I am a 48-year-old divorced man who has been dating a divorcee for five years. Last night I asked her to marry me, only to be told she was not ready and afraid of being hurt again.
Should I stay in this relationship, or stop seeing her and try to start another relationship? I'm afraid that staying in this one much longer will prevent me from finding someone else who would marry me. -- REJECTED AND DEJECTED IN OHIO
REJECTED, if your only goal is the get hitched you should move on. If you wanted to marry her because you're happy with what you have and wanted a bit more, then more isn't in the cards right now. If your still happy with what you got then you have something that makes you happy and you're an idiot for thinking to walk away.
See Abby's responses at http://www.uexpress.com/dearabby/?uc_full_date=20100305
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